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By now, my pain was still acute, but I lived with it more comfortably, as much as I lived with his memory. I’ve tried to do my best to spread his teaching and found to have a green-thumb. I grow all sorts of things now, but mostly hope and understanding. My fingers furrow the warm soil and I remember how it felt to have his hair run through them. I water the seeds and remember how sometimes, I would weep over his shoulder. I would carefully tend, each and every one of my newfound children as I recalled how he would pat and sooth my worries through his gentle touch. Other people join me for awhile, here and there and I tell them of our smiles. I tell them of the sun glowing over your shoulder. I tell them of how simple our love was. Not too many understand, but I plant as many seeds as I can. I’ve grown so much for you and so much because of you. I could not keep you living by my side, but I would hope that all I have grown in your name, will live on to smile for us. My dreams are no. A knock at the door brought me back into the moment. Wrapping the towel around my waist, I reached for the dead-bolt and opened the door. To my pleasant surprise, it was Mr. Patel. He was holding a small ice-bucket. The ice machine was all the way back near the motel office, he explained. Therefore, he made it a practice to deliver ice to each guest personally. I thanked him. We both stood there. He smiled, somewhat uncomfortably. As if on a whim, I invited him into the room.Stepping inside, he appeared a little nervous. The act of standing a few feet from another man also with roots from India and who was dressed only in a wet towel and wet hair appeared to rattle his married, Indian, old-world sensibilities. And yet he did not seem to want to leave. To put him at ease, I smiled at him and asked if he would like to visit for a few minutes. Slowly, as if deciding to cross an imaginary bridge he had only vaguely formulated in his mind, Mr. Patel accepted my invitation and sat down on.
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